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Russia's Top Anchor Laments #MeToo Prudery, Recalls Swinging Sixties (Kiselyov)

"Don't touch, don't breathe, don't wink, don't smile, don't whistle, sit still."

Christine Keeler's memoirs about a Soviet military man, whom she called the "Russian bear."

"He started kissing me, I gradually I felt the desire arising in him. He knocked me to the floor. Evgeny wanted good old fashioned sex, without any slyness, he got it, and he was very much up to the task."

"A couple of years ago in the UK, Sophie Tanner married herself. And now she confessed that she had cheated in this seemingly chaste marriage."

This post first appeared on Russia Insider

Compare the intellectual level of this discussion of recent history and social mores from Russia's main news program, with the tedious, puritanism #MeTooism running rampant in the US.

Kiselyov, as is most of Russia, is dumbfounded by the sexual weirdness emitting from the West — people marrying themselves, even marrying chandeliers — male members of parliament exchanging marriage vows in parliament on television — enjoy this stroll through the weirdness.

Kiselyov is at the top of his game here.

Christine Keeler, who had simultaneous affairs with a London KGB agent, and the British Defense Minister, bringing down the government

In this video, Russia's top news anchor Dmitry Kiselyov tells the story of this real-life bond girl, and it's just as glamorous and scandalous as you would think. (Full transcript below)

Video Transcript:

Kiselyov (Russia's Top Anchor):

On Monday, Christine Keeler died from a lung disease at a hospital in Farnborough, London. She was 75. Christine was a symbol of a grandiose sex scandal, due to which in the UK in the early 1960s, Harold Macmillan's conservative government fell and the rearmament program of the Royal Nuclear Submarine Fleet was postponed.

Christine Keeler's main story began in 1961. Let’s remember this date. Only months remained until the Cuban Missile Crisis.

In 1961, the US and the USSR were only just pointing missiles at each other at point-blank range. The US from Turkey. The USSR from Cuba.

Meanwhile, a great sexual revolution was unfolding in the west. After liberating men and women, that revolution became an era of great romance, and left behind great movies, such as "Breakfast at Tiffany's," in 1961 with Audrey Hepburn. So you can feel the style and atmosphere. The intoxicating human feelings were clearly felt after the victory over fascism. And fresh perceptions of new freedom.

In the USSR, interest in male and female relationships had also increased, but moderately. But in this sphere, the Khrushchev thaw also made itself felt.

The most popular song of 1961 was Maya Kristalinskaya's

"And the snow keeps falling:" "Snow is falling, snow is falling, And everything flickers and floats, Thank you snow, that you're in my life."

And Soviet fashion was shyly trying miniskirts.

And the uncompromisingly phallic, Vostok 1 touched American's heart. And this is what the first man in space, Gagarin, sang in space in 1961: "I believe my friends, rocket caravans, will take us, from star to star."

All this to better understand the loud mixture of cultural background noise in which the young, handsome Soviet naval attache in London, Yevgeny Ivanov, fell prey during the Western sexual revolution.

And you can't have a revolution without revolutionists. Christine Keeler was one of them. A model, and mistress of Prince Philippe, British Defense Minister, John Profumo, and also of the Soviet naval attache in London, Yevgeny Ivanov.

These were different times and different passions. And how flat would the world become if the modern Western quirks with all their unconditionally condemned "sexual harassment" was relevant then. And that what was perceived as pranks and romance in the early 1960s, is criminal today.

Don't touch, don't breathe, don't wink, don't smile, don't whistle, sit still. Female qualities aren't what men think due to their depravity. And male ones, it appears, are disgusting.

In 1961, men and women were different. Just look at the lines from Christine Keeler's memoirs. Just listen, no woman in the West will write this today. It's about the first date with the Soviet military attache, whom she called the "Russian bear." They were, of course, drinking vodka.

Christine Keeler:

"He was getting annoyed when I started adding tonic to my glass, and then he started kissing me, at first Evgeny wasn't very excited, but gradually I felt the desire arising in him. He knocked me to the floor. Evgeny wanted good old fashioned sex, without any slyness, he got it, and he was very much up to the task."


That was about the Soviet military attache, Yevgeny Ivanov. But it so happened that almost at the same time Christine Keeler got into an affair with the British Minister of Defense, John Profumo. Later it was reported that the lovers enjoyed each other in a red mini-cooper. For some, it might seem a bit tight, but in England, it's a separate type of sport: how many people can fit into a mini-cooper. And this appears to be that very same red mini-cooper, in black and white, next to Profumo's house.

But Christine Keeler prefers to remember other things.

Christine Keeler:

"The next day John Profumo picked me up in a huge limousine. He was 46, twice as old as I, but I was ecstatic that the Minister was meeting with me, this is how the Profumo affair began. I don't remember sex with him well, at first he was shy in bed, but later it became better."


Revolutionary Christine Keeler, perceived victories over men as moments of triumph. "I was ecstatic," as she writes in her memoirs.

Everything ended, of course, with a grandiose scandal. But by pure chance: everything would have gone on as usual but a jealous admirer of Christine's suddenly started shooting. Police, questionings, House of Commons investigations, and the handsome Soviet military attache also came up.

The Defense Minister, Profumo, was very quickly kicked out of the British Cabinet. And then, the whole British government fell as well. Prime Minister Macmillan resigned. And then the conservatives lost the election. Wilson, from the Labor party, became the PM.

The Soviet naval attache, the "Russian bear," Yevgeny Ivanov, received a divorce from his faithful wife Maya, and the Order of Lenin from the Presidium of the Supreme Council.

Those were the times and passions. Now, everything's different.

On Thursday, Time magazine published a long-awaited cover, traditionally meant for the "Person of the Year." On it, 5 bored female faces. Some are known to the public, others aren't. But all are portrayed as heroes: They talked about the men who had harassed them. They are the victims. You don't bother them anymore, and others as well.

A change of heroes among men as well. On Monday in Australia during the parliamentary debates on same-sex marriage, representative Tim Wilson, publicly addressed his colleague:

Tim Wilson:

- There's only one thing left to do, Ryan Bolger, will you marry me?

He blushed, but the answer came quick and loud.

- Yes.

The head of the Australian Parliament: "Congratulations!"


So the law was adopted in Australia.

Women are also trying to live in a new way.

A couple of years ago in the UK, Sophie Tanner married herself. And now she confessed that she had cheated in this seemingly chaste marriage. She started a romance with a man, how could she! And lived with him 5 months. This man, however, later also chose freedom and married himself. Now Sophie is disappointed. Since one half of her marriage wasn't that perfect. And the half that still remained faithful to the other, is now terribly jealous of the one that we would probably call healthy.

A less risky path was chosen by another Briton, Amanda Liberty, who got engaged to a chandelier, this one, with 6 long protruding candles. Ever since she met the lighting device in Germany, she couldn't forget her destiny and dreamed of it.

Amanda Liberty: "I couldn't stop thinking about her and how beautiful she was, she has such a beautiful shape, and I could feel really amazing energy coming from her."


And we can see Amanda's whole photo session with the object of her love. And here she's again posing, either before her first marriage night, or right after. Her face is ruddy and truly happy.

And I don't even want to think about which of them will cheat first on the other.

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