Russia Election Outcome Explained in Plain Simple English

Here are the preliminary results with only 76% of the votes counted (but the outcome is already obvious) explained in simple, plain English:

1) Putin easily wins by a landslide and is *more* popular than ever

2) The Russian Communists and Zhirinovsky have reached terminal irrelevancy

3) Only 2.6% of Russians are pro-USA and generally pro-West (Sobchak+Yavlinsky)

4) The entire AngloZionist anti-Putin campaign has miserably failed

5) The Empire has two choices left: go to war or fold

6) If the Empire choses to to go war it will face a completely united Russia

And here are the detailed scores as of 22:51 UTC:

Source: The Saker