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Is Putin Dating Some Boxer Lady? No, but Let's Say 'Yes'

This is becoming childish

This post first appeared on Russia Insider

"It's always heartwarming to be able to report when a despotic world leader finds find [sic] love -- or at least a companion who shares his love for tough-guy-gal displays of fitness and physical combat," writes the San Jose Mercury News, reminding everyone why nobody reads the San Jose Mercury News.

We wish this latest rumor (not to be outdone by the previous rumor, "Rumored Putin Girlfriend Rumored Pregnant, According to Rumors"), was specific to San Jose, but alas, your obnoxious Facebook friends, none of whom live in San Jose, have already "liked" it — courtesy of the Daily Beast

<figcaption>As the photograph clearly shows, Putin is having hot, steamy sex with this woman</figcaption>
As the photograph clearly shows, Putin is having hot, steamy sex with this woman

Here's the Cliff Notes version of this extremely fictitious scandal: Putin was photographed sitting next to a lady. Not on top of a lady. Just sitting, as many men do with many women. Let's see how the Daily Beast handles this: 

Ragozina and Putin’s most recent appearance together was from an international sambo tournament in Sochi last week, from which the Kremlin disseminated an official photo of Ragozina—wearing a body-hugging blue dress—smiling excitedly at Putin. The caption was decidedly more stale: “Russian President Vladimir Putin (R) sits next to former boxer Natalia Ragozina (Natascha Ragosina) as they attend an international combat sambo tournament.”

Yeah, why is the caption describing what the photograph shows? That's not what captions are for. 

Putin must apologize to the Russian people for his brazen public sex acts. Get a room, you two! And then sit next to each other. 

P.S. - Putin is actually dating Hillary Clinton. You heard it here first. 

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