Western Civilization Will Collapse If Trump Hugs Putin at G20 Summit
Experts agree: Even the slightest hint of goodwill between Trump and Putin at the upcoming G20 summit in Germany could collapse the US economy and destroy NATO
As Trump prepares to meet with Russian President Vladimir Putin on the sidelines of the upcoming G20 summit in Hamburg, Americans ("preppers" excluded, since they are already amply prepared) are frantically stocking up on canned beans and shotgun slugs.
There is absolutely no doubt in anyone's mind that the pillars of western civilization (NATO, CNN) will self-destruct if Trump so much as half-smiles at Putin during their scheduled encounter in Germany.
This self-explanatory truth was verbalized by none other than John McCain's voluptuous daughter during Fox News' critically-acclaimed program, "Boring People Sit and Talk".
Meghan McCain's candid advice to Trump? "Be vigilant. If you smile too much, hug, and behave too friendly with Putin" everyone will go bananas.
Can you imagine the headlines if Trump and Putin respectfully greet one another? "KGB PAPA BEAR GETS COZY WITH YOUNG CUB"; "SMILEGATE: MUELLER CONFIRMS PROBE INTO TRUMP'S FACIAL EXPRESSIONS"; "THE HANDSHAKE THAT MURDERED THE US CONSTITUTION"; etc. etc.
Putin undoubtedly recognizes the tremendous power that he now possesses. Imagine if he gives Trump a playful slap on the ass? Rachel Maddow would jump out the nearest available window.
We're not even being facetious. The great and beautiful irony of RussiaGate is that as a result of nonstop, around-the-clock Russia baiting, a simple wink from Putin in the general direction of Trump would probably ignite riots and bank runs across the United States. Also, NATO's high command would probably commit mass seppuku.
We're not saying Putin should do this. We're just saying.
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