Israel Inconsolable After Failing to Gobble up Another Slice of Syria

Six years of supporting "moderate" rebels for nothing. Talk about a bad break

Tue, Mar 21, 2017
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Better luck next time?
Better luck next time?

One can understand the extreme frustration that Benjamin Netanyahu must be feeling right now. 

Israel's Prime Minister isn't just embroiled in an endless laundry list of corruption scandals — he also failed to expand (or secure) Israel's foothold in Syria.

That's not very good. 

We've been keeping a close eye on the Israeli media over the last few days, and we're amazed at its transparent eulogies for ISIS and the "moderate" rebels:

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An interesting choice of words. Especially the "carved up" part. We suppose that if any country knows anything about carving up Syria, it would be Israel. 

We are of course referring to Syria's Golan Heights, the "western two-thirds" of which are currently occupied and administered by Israel. Did we type "occupied"? We mean liberated. 

For the last six years, Israel has tried to pretend that it has no horse in the "western/Sunni medieval dictatorship" war against Syria. Like Swiss bankers hoarding Nazi gold during World War II, Israel claimed total neutrality as it waited impatiently to cash in. 

Of course, it didn't just "wait". It also bombed Syria repeatedly (to "stop Hezbollah") and openly supported Al Qaeda in Syria. But that is neither here nor there. 

The reality is that no country would have benefited more from a destroyed Syria than Israel. 

If Assad fell and Syria went up in flames, Israel would take permanent ownership of the Golan, and would likely snag a few extra slices of Syria to ensure a proper "buffer zone" between Israel and the hell hole that was formerly Syria. With probably zero objections from the international community. Mission accomplished!

There's never been any real attempt to hide it: Even senior Israeli officials have stated that if they had to choose, they'd rather have ISIS than Iran in Syria

That doesn't sound very neutral to us.

We get it: Israel doesn't like Iran, and Iran doesn't like Israel. 

But anyone who thinks that Israel was rooting for a peaceful, stable Syria is out to lunch. 

Netanyahu was betting on a moon crater neighbor. And a new slice of Syria. 

Better luck next time?

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